Anonymous asks: “After months of silence he was all about me on a night out with mutual friends — he’s clearly still attracted. So, I want to know what’s stopping him from trying to get back in touch/hang out/hook up. Cheers!”
The Nature of the block: 8 of Pentacles
The nature of the issue (what’s stopping him) is coming up Pentacles, which is interesting. So we know we’re dealing with something in the realm of the material or financial. Pentacles also encapsulate the actual ACTION of working hard and reaping the rewards of doing so. The 8 of Pentacles in specific is all about building foundations. It is also a big one for indicating a Workaholic. Someone who is extremely engrossed right now in whatever project they are trying to accomplish. There are tie-ins with the type of work that benefits more than just the self, but can be utilized (or enjoyed) by the community at large. This can include the work of artists of any kind— so I wonder if he is perhaps trying to break into a field of something; music maybe? In any case, the nature of this block seems to be that he is very focused on something right now that isn’t romance related. I get the feeling from this card that it could be something that others view as simply a hobby, and also that he may be downplaying it and not revealing just how much he cares about it. In relationship readings, the workaholism thing arises again.
Being that this card was drawn to explain a BLOCKAGE, it’s also important to look at the 8 of Pentacles Reversed for clues. When the card reverses, it deals with any distortion on the spectrum of total disinterest and lack of motivation vs. total obsession to the point that it is disturbing one’s ability to function. I remember when I was first learning card meanings, I took note of all cards that spoke of “perfectionism in a self-contained world”, as that is a struggle that I deal with in my life daily. This is the scenario where a person is SO focused on some kind of project that they are upset when something tries to pull them away from it, even just to shift gears and do something else for a while.
What can be done about this: Ace of Wands
Ahh, interesting— an Ace. I freaking LOVE Aces because they are all about potential as well as an enormous NEW energy that sweeps in and sort of “resets” your current energy. This is a strong indication that the only thing that can release him from his stuck-ness is going to be a total replacement of his current mindset.
The Ace of Wands is the potential for creation. It is a new beginning which will involve a lot of new awareness about one’s spiritual side, learning to live authentically (being true to himself), and reprioritizing of the people and aspects of one’s life to be condusive to these pursuits. This may be saying that he needs to clear some people out of his life who are stifling him. It could also be saying that he needs to make changes that will free up his creative— and PASSIONATE sides. This is a card about sexual passion also, so it does seem to apply…
Likely outcome: The Star, Reversed
This one threw me for a loop, so I did a bit of thinking about what this card means in this position.
Returning to the previous cards, we see the nature of the problem, we see how to fix THIS PROBLEM (remember, this problem is a problem that YOU have— he may not necessarily see it as problematic). So the outcome of “fixing” this issue and getting him to stop the hesitation and just open up to you/proceed with obvious romantic feelings… is in the Star, Reversed.
This card sounds very negative. But bear with me as I try to apply it to the situation.
The Star Reversed can also be explained as a distortion somewhere on a spectrum— this time, you have the spectrum of pessimism and lack of inspiration vs. optimism, inspiration and hope.
Disappointment, a blow to self-esteem, and beginning to lose inspiration are things that come up with this card. Feeling hopeless even though all is not lost (coming after an Ace, this makes sense). A negative, cynical mindset.
This card can also represent when someone is sort of… all talk, no action. They talk aboout the power of positive thinking and optimism and faith— but only as concepts, not substance. This can point to a person who is relying on their religious faith to solve all of their problems, while doing absolutely nothing themselves to help the process. In some ways, this makes me think of my own partner who sometimes drives me crazy with his advice to me when I’m struggling— it’s going to get better, just give it time, keep your chin up, etc. I’m all like “BUT HOW DOES THIS HELP ME NOW?!?”… and in the end, I always find he was right. I see him living by these principals and kind of find myself thinking “well where’s your positive thinking NOW?” every time he’s upset about something… I know. Horribly immature of me. But do you see where I’m going here?
In summary, I feel like the first card is really “where its at”— and perhaps things are really not as they seem. There’s something else going on with this boy, and he sure is doing a good job of confusing you about his intentions. I’m thinking that the Ace of Wands as a “way to fix it” is not actually the way that it’s supposed to play out. The two of you have different focuses in life right now— and the Star Reversed tells us it’s only temporary.
Think about what things he’s got going on in his life right now— how much do you know? Perhaps you should approach him with a bit more interest in his hobbies and what he spends his time thinking about. Even though you ARE interested— that doesn’t seem to be getting through to him, because he’s still being quiet and mysterious about his intentions. He might need to trust you a little better. He might need you to just be his unconditional friend and confidante before he can feel free to release and proceed with his feelings for you.
I hope this helps and I’d LOVE to hear any of your impressions.